Dec 11, 2021
You can’t have too many friends
Having moved 11 times before graduating high school, I’m not scared of making new friends… But can you have too many?
Up until my 20s, I certainly didn’t think so.
In high school, I had a very real Mean Girls moment… None of my friends showed up to lunch. Following in Lindsay Lohan’s footsteps, I ate alone in the bathroom.
After a lackluster social life in high school, the appeal of joining a sorority was not lost on me. Guaranteed friends — yes please!
I packed my social calendar to the max. Date parties, service events, formals… I was living the dream. Not being the “new girl” felt amazing.
As graduation approached, my friends started having opinions about my life…
- You want to go to grad school? Why?
- Personal trainers don’t make much money, why are you interested in that?
- You want to stay in this college town? How boring…
Though I didn’t appreciate the critisim, I’m stubborn and followed through on my decisions.
Once my friends headed off to the big city (Dallas) I had a lot of time to contemplate what would come next. During the summers, I visited them and enjoyed their company…
But eventually it hit me that my friends wanted fast money, fast relationships, and fast drugs. I now wanted a meaningful career, a loving relationship, and fulfillment.
In order to get those things I needed time to read books & watch Youtube videos. To buy Bitcoin & start a podcast. To write blogs & film IG reels. To fail and try again.
Now that I’m 5 years post-grad, I know distancing myself from my college friends was the right move. I’m on a path that reflects my own values, and I don’t feel the weight of their opinions dragging me down.
I’m not proposing that you cut off all your friends. But if you feel yourself being pulled into rocky situations, I encourage you to spend some time alone.
Pick up those abandoned hobbies. Finish that book. Start that blog. You don’t have to do these activities perfectly or consistently. But they’ll help you get back in touch with yourself, which is crucial to building a life you love.
Sometimes we do have too many friends influencing our decisions.
